A few tips for those
looking to waste their relationships.
The phrase "bad friend" is kind of strange.
Friends are supposed to be good things and yet, almost all of us can think of a
few (or maybe more than a few) friends who haven't been very "good
friends."
And plenty of us have been that sort of friend as well.
The reason is simple: friendships can be tough.
Although relationships are a fundamental part of the human
experience, our dealings with friends, family members, significant others,
co-workers and superiors are often riddled with strife. Difficult personal and
workplace relationships are far more than a nuisance. They can cause anxiety,
burnout, clinical depression and even physical illness.
The bottom line is this: the right relationships can propel
you to great heights of achievement; the wrong ones will tether you to
mediocrity. With this in mind, it’s essential to evaluate connections
intelligently: What makes a bad friendship?
Hide
While secret identities might be fun in the movies, a person
who harbors secrets and hides their fears and beliefs from others will never be
able to enjoy an authentic relationship. Being real with others and even making
yourself vulnerable from time to time can foster tremendous emotional
connections—including all-important trust—and forge unbreakable bonds.
Tweak the Truth
Studies show that 10-30 percent of applicants admit to “tweaking”
their resumes—and that’s no way to start an engagement with a new employer. The
same can be true in friendships and other relationships—we present ourselves as
we want to be seen instead of as we are. But lying—even small white lies—will
do nothing but undermine any relationship. Even slightly altering the truth is
one of the most destructive forces that can permanently damage a friendship.
Try to be Close to
Everyone
The people in your life right now are setting the course for
next week, month, year and possibly the rest of your life. Accordingly, there
must be a qualification and selection process for friends and others you choose
to surround yourself with. Blocking the wrong people from your life is the only
way to make room for the right people who help you achieve your dreams, enrich
your lives, and create satisfying life experience.
Rush In and Miss the
Red Flags
Understand that any relationship is a journey with changes
in direction, twists and turns and roadblocks along the way. It’s imperative to
pass through certain experiences and navigate through difficulties to learn
from these situations and create a healthy outcome. Resist the desire to take
shortcuts or race through certain aspects of a friendship. Even if it is
painful or boring, embrace it, knowing that it offers a healthy purpose for the
big picture of a relationship.
Repeat the Past
The past should not define a person, and there is no reason
to keep looking back. While previous events and actions might be a life lesson,
the nature of every journey is to move forward. Don’t repeat those actions that
did not produce the intended results; instead, focus on new choices that will
affect a better outcome.
Be a Taker
All relationships involve give and take, so it's important
to recognize when a friendship could use more of a giving spirit. When we think
about what we can do for others instead of what they can do for us, we get to
the very heart of healthy, successful interactions. In a strong friendship,
both people willingly give, far more than they take.
Stay in an Unhealthy
Relationship
Unfortunately, sometimes we make a poor choice and enter
into relationships that will never be healthy no matter what actions are taken.
We need to know when and how to end a toxic relationship. If someone is not
able to accept a change in the status or direction, is not loyal and stable
under pressure or in the face of challenge, or had once been dependable but now
is unreliable, these are strong clues that the relationship may not be worth
saving. Don’t let feelings of misplaced guilt or sympathy get in the way of
making good personal choices.
Forget Who and What
Really Matters
The most valuable people in life aren’t always the most
visible. People of true value bring fulfillment, not frustration. All too
often, those taken for granted or overlooked are the ones that silently help us
achieve goals, provide encouragement or offer important insights and
connections.
There are no neutral relationships; each one lifts you up or
weighs you down. Only by learning which is which and how to turn the tide on
those that are negative—can you then take the appropriate action. Not to be
taken lightly, these actions and decisions can make the difference between a
great, happy life or one that is riddled with disappointment, failure and
regret.
Read more at
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/8-ways-be-bad-friend#QeHdOuvtmo8tjKBr.99
No comments:
Post a Comment