Key #3 - Be Into What Your Spouse is Into (but have your own gig too!)

And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2:21&24)

Guess what?!?!? If she likes golf, you like golf.  That doesn’t mean you have to play golf with her every weekend but it does mean that you are open to the idea of going when she asks. It can also mean her golf days are a family event in that you always have breakfast together before she leaves to go play or maybe you always meet at your favorite spot to eat afterward.  Maybe you have a ritual of watching your favorite movie together the night before?  

You know what else?!? If he likes soccer, you like soccer. Maybe you don’t play but you will be at every game.  You may even go to practices, if that’s important to him. You look for soccer related stuff to give to him as gifts.  You are at practice with cold water for him and maybe his favorite snack for the ride home. And if his game/practice times are his special “guy time”, you respect that.

The two of you are one. Ideally you and your spouse are operating with one heart and one mind. Yes, you and your spouse are individuals who are fearfully and wonderfully made by our creator, and you are unique and precious (Psalm 139:14). It is expected that you will have different interests, different love languages, different communication styles, different definitions of fun, etc… As a matter of fact, please make sure that you do! Don’t get lost in your spouse’s identity. Be who God designed you to be and do what God designed you to do. But you can show your spouse that you are invested in them by caring about what they care about.

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